The Universe Says ‘Hi’

by beccaborrelli


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“We’re friends kind of…”

Last night I stayed up until 1 in the morning writing an essay asking the Texas Wireless Association to give me money for an art program I’ve dreamt about for [probably] seven years. A one page essay that literally took me over 30 hours to write.

Not because it was hard,

but because it mattered so much.

Not because I really need this money,

but because putting a dream on paper is like putting yourself there too.

Yeah, that’s scary terrifying.

Not because the writing sucked, (well okay the first draft sucked. Thank goodness for a lawyer roommate that is an editing machine)…

But because by last night I think my writing was on fire.

[insert exclamation points]

Was reminded the ancient greeks believed ideas don’t come from people… ideas come through people from an unknown and invisible source. If and when we get out tha’ way the idea will come through so clearly we might wonder where the [resist expletive] it came from.

And sometimes….

SOMETIMES…

Something comes through so clearly we can feel it as it’s happening. And that feeling, while it is happening… is so MUCH… I barely sustained 10 minutes of writing between snack breaks and pacing around the living room. Thank goodness for a patient universe that waited while I grew a pair. I’ve been chased by this most of my life, but honestly I think I first faced it in my bed last night with my hand in a bag of tortilla chips, and a MacBook on my lap.

Does else know what I’m talking about? My comment bar (and me!) would love to hear about it. I’m off to the post office!

***

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”

~ Marianne Williamson

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